i really do not know what and where this post will lead me but one thing for sure this post is eventually making me ok and getting rid of the clinical depression i know is coming soon, or i may say it is already there....

it was so fast! it came and eventually it's going to end!???????

that i don't know. super hard! when you are caught up in things with many options. the fears, the tears, the sadness... one thing i definitely ask my self everyday things come my mind is---- WHY ME??????

and i just hope that march will be here so soon as for me to know where i will be after these incidents... but one thing i am sure of totally, i will treasure this. and if God will give me another moment to live i will still prefer having you again (after all the things we had way before this stupid beating came), but correct the things that happened. i am not saying that the things happened and happening are wrong. but a friend, my best friend- marriane told me, that things are not yet ok if it ends in a bad way. so certainly there is still a brighter rainbow after! my pride who is my super bestiest friend is telling me that "sana wala na lang ni nahitabo"...

cry? im done with that
it haunts me--- i run
i run---no where,
and that gun is just the sole reason to end this fun
help me
slap me
or eventually kill me...

i don't want to entertain this
i don't
but it comes
it runs into my nerves

will i entertain others
and that will be an additional burden
hope not!

o.a ang die, but kung di ra jud sala ay wa na gugmang giatay!

LECHE!